Umm… Advice?

“When people have been let down so very badly by the rest of society… my advice, as a Christian priest, is to shoplift.”  So said Tim Jones, parish priest at St. Lawrence and St. Hilda in York, England. His reasoning was that his parishioners could steal from large, national businesses, rather than family run stores, and the costs would ultimately be passed on to the rest of us.  For some reason, that seemed okay.

I must say, this struck me as awfully strange counsel.  But it also got me to wondering about what other questionable wisdom people were tossing around.  So I did a quick search for strange suggestions, and bits of eyebrow-raising advice.  Here’s a touch of what I found:

  • On finding a job in tough times:  During a job interview, stand out from the crowd by singing your answers to interview questions.
  • Relationship advice:  A book offers help on How to Tell if Your Boyfriend is the Anti-Christ.  The advice doesn’t stop there.  The subtitle reads:  And If He Is, Should You Break Up With Him?
  • Help from someone named Heidi:  Call for honest guidance on aliens, angels, shadow people, ghosts, and holy encounters.
  • For vacationers:  To encourage a deep tan, eat plenty of carrots and apricots about a month before you go away.
  • Air travel advice:  To stop your feet from swelling on a plane flight, put your feet in brown paper bags, then pull your socks over them.
  • For a restful night:  Fill a bag half full with sand for a hard but comfortable pillow.
  • And lastly:  Tarantulas usually travel in pairs…  So look out for the other one.

Should you decide to grasp hold of any of these nuggets and follow the advice, please do me a favor and don’t let anyone know you read it here!  Especially not the shoplifting!

“I make the most of all that comes, and the least of all that goes.”

Sara Teasdale


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